Suprise, Mom!

Perhaps you all can recall the incident with my glow in the dark basketball? Its slow motion and unexpected disappearance to the wallowing depths of the tunnel/ditch? My desparation for it to return? The providencial chance that mom drove up just as Charina lowered me face first into the ditch to retrieve said ball, and everyone was then present to watch me stare death in the face? And of course, our victory in successfully retrieving the ball? Yes, indeed, a story worth repeating throughout the ages, and one I never thought I'd wish to relive in any way.

Switch gears with me for a second.

What kind of things would come to your mind if I said...

Sydney?

Hmm.. Gross, maybe, fat, ugly, old, hairy, dirty, opera house, lazy, undesirable, suprisingly obese, and because I feel cruel being truthful, maybe cute or nice.

But mostly just gross, right?

(That's even a flattering picture)

Well, Mom, the hero non-bottom feeder of this family, decided to take some good initiative and bathe the poor beast. We were all impressed with her bravery and skill, and a... cleaner Sydney (she's pretty much stained) was a welcome sight. One hair covered lawn, broken hair brush and hose down later, Mom wiped her hands and leashed Syd to the door, calling Bum and I to watch her and make sure she didn't return miserably to her little niche under the deck. Sorry, Mom....

We took too long to get downstairs, and arrived only to see Syd's fluffy tail disappearing to DirtLand beneath the deck.

Well, of course, we had to devise some way to get her out of there and rewash her before Mom came home and saw her hard work gone away. But there was no getting Sydney out, even after we sprayed some water down where she might have been laying. The only choice, my patient audience, was for me to call upon my basketball retrieving skills and slither back to the wretched creature.

Adamantly, she remained where she was, but Summer ingeniously crafted a long stick with a cigar pretzel duck taped to the end, and I was able to tempt Sydney inch by inch- meaning of course- I had to stare her snarling, upset, grouchy, growling snout (synonomous with death) in the face. What a fright! Never before have I actually seen hatred glow in someone's eyes, but my dirt covered body shivered in fear from the gleam in Sydney's. Doug helped by actually grabbing Sydney's leash and dragging her out for the last four feet or so.

We rebathed her and innocently smiled when Mom came home, not mentioning the incident. Little did she know I had crawled underneath the deck and got Sydney,so suprise, mom! it was a fine adventure, but my stomach got scratched up-at least I wasn't nine months pregnant!(oh, wait, people in that situation just climb 10 ft. fences. Good one, Jame!)